As a freshman in high school I was made fully aware that most students my age didn't take their school work seriously, and would fall behind. I feared that I would fail classes, I didn't want to lose out on credits and have to take the same class more than once - some students were more worried than I was; and some students didn't give a damn, and this one's about all of them.
I was generally excited about starting high school, I was ready to grow up and experience a seat at the big kids table. The little eager 14 year old I was, was in for a rude ass awakening. High school started out great, I made new friends, got all new teachers, I was happy with where I was. Over time, the way things were changing had really shown me how much of a mess high school can really be. It was about half way through freshman year that I realized that things aren't as 'cash money' as they seemed to be.
My question has always been, why? Why do certain individuals feel the need to make other's feel miserable? I tried for months to not give a shit about the things that were happening, but I certainly reached a breaking point.
To be blunt, I was bullied in high school for being overweight, for being gay, for the clothes I wore, and for just about anything I did. Being overweight was something that I personally feel like I have struggled with just about my entire life. I always turned to food for comfort and especially had a problem with drinking soda and eating sweets. Being gay is something I cannot control, it wasn't that I woke up one day and decided to give myself something to be made fun of for; by all means, I wouldn't change myself for the world, but some just don't understand that. The clothing I wore was interesting, not everyone wears a black shirt WITH a jacket, and jeans in the summer, but I did! I liked the look, and that's all that mattered to me. Rest assured, I sure have changed that part a lot.
While attending school, the student's weird looks, rude remarks and foolish gestures towards me had pushed me over the edge. Because of the pain and sadness I endured by a group of students, I found myself missing a lot of school, there were times that I wouldn't show up for over a week. With this being a long lasting issue, the school administration was notified; and meeting after meeting with the principals and councilors "something was going to be done about it." Yeah, that was bullshit!
After half of my freshman year being a disaster, I decided to reenroll at the same school. I thought that all of the previous issues would be resolved and I can start fresh, and oh boy was I fucking wrong. The first couple months of my sophomore year were just fine but the stupidity bounced right back and things were just as they were the year before. | I put on my big boy panties and stuck it through the whole year, all while the school administration pointed and laughed. I can proudly say, that after two years of fighting with other students and staff, I turned my happy ass around and walked out of that building for the last time.
With my beloved peers alongside the grade A staffing not doing what they said they would do, I had no other choice but to leave. From there, the second half of my high school career, is for a whole other story. Cheers!
* If you or a loved one is experiencing something like what you've read above, please-please reach out to me, you can find my email at the bottom of the main homepage. *